IJMC - It's All Fun and Games Til Someone Loses an Eye...

I wish I knew how many times I've known what I should do and then not 
done it. How many times have I behaved badly or at the best, poorly. 
Times I could have done the good thing, been true to myself and others, 
yet not done so. When I've actually thought what I know to be right to 
do and still done what I knew I shouldn't do. I've been weak when I 
should have been strong. I've been rude when I should have been polite. 
I've been lazy when I should have been active. I've failed to grasp life 
by the horns and hang on for all I'm worth. I have been less than I 
could, and far less than I want to be. 

How many times have I wished for strength, while all this time all the 
strength I could ever need has resided within myself?              -dave





  Observations of Life

   1. I started out with nothing...I still have most of it.
   2. When did my wild oats turn to prunes and all bran?
   3. I finally got my head together, now my body is falling apart.
   4. Funny, I don't remember being absent minded.
   5. All reports are in. Life is now officially unfair.
   6. If all is not lost, where is it?
   7. It is easier to get older than it is to get wiser.
   8. If at first you do succeed, try not to look too astonished.
   9. The first rule of holes: If you are in one, stop digging.
  10. I tried to get a life once, but they were out of stock.
  11. I went to school to become a wit, only got halfway through.
  12. It was all so different before everything changed.
  13. Some days you're the dog, some days the hydrant.
  14. Nostalgia isn't what is used to be.
  15. Old programmers never die. They just terminate and stay resident.
  16. A day without sunshine is like a day in Seattle.
  17. I wish the buck stopped here. I could use a few.
  18. Never serve peanut butter to kids in the back seat of the car
      especially if the family dog is with them.
  19. It's not the pace of life that concerns me, it's the sudden stop at
      the end.
  20. It's hard to make a comeback when you haven't been anywhere.
  21. Living on Earth is expensive, but it does include a free trip around
      the sun.
  22. The only time the world beats a path to your door is if you're in the
      bathroom.
  23. If God wanted me to touch my toes, he would have put them on my
      knees.
  24. Never knock on Death's door; ring the bell and run (he hates that).
  25. Lead me not into temptation (I can find the way myself).
  26. When you're finally holding all the cards, why does everyone else
      decide to play chess.
  27. If you're living on the edge, make sure you're wearing your seat
      belt.
  28. There are two kinds of pedestrians...the quick and the dead.
  29. An unbreakable toy is useful for breaking other toys.
  30. A closed mouth gathers no feet.
  3l. Health is merely the slowest possible rate at which one can die.
  32. It's not hard to meet expenses...they're everywhere.
  33. Jury: Twelve people who determine which client has the better 
      attorney.
  34. The only difference between a rut and a grave is the depth.