IJMC - Time For a New Server

I'm telling you, we just can't interface. I don't know what to do. I try 
to talk and it's like they're ignoring me. I can't even ask if we've done 
this before. So in the end, everyone around us may suffer, watching us do 
the same thing again and again. Am I talking about my last relationship? 
Well, maybe that too, but I'm talking about my poor overloaded server, 
Vodka. <BEG="ON"> Anyone have a decent Pentium or K6 or better system they'd 
care to donate to the cause? Any SCSI hard drives or CD-ROM drives? I've 
got a case, floppy, video, and SCSI controller...but I need the motherboard, 
CPU, memory, and storage space. I've even got the tape drive for 
backups...anyone wanna donate a system or parts to the IJMC? <BEG="OFF"> 
Ok, so in reality I need to simply upgrade this system I'm using here, 
and pass along the older parts to make the new server...which is what 
I've been planning...I just haven't gotten to yet...why do I guess that 
I'll get to it before anyone donates enough...                         -dave





BREAKING UP IS HARD TO DO... especially when you share the same major!

PSYCHOLOGY:   Girl accuses guy of just using her as a substitute for his 
Mother.

SOCIOLOGY:    Each claims to have been oppressed in the relationship.

RELIGION:     Each prays for reconcilliation and/or curses God

ARCHAEOLOGY:  One tries to bury the past, and accuses the other of trying 
to dig it up.

THEATRE:      "OH MY GOD!  Life is... ENDED... as we KNOW it!"

BIOLOGY:      "You just wanted to get in my genes!"

PHYSICS:      Both resign themselves to the fact that what goes up must 
come down.

JOURNALISM:   "Today was the end of an era.  Jack, 19, and Jill, 18, 
called an end to their relationship of 2 weeks..."

WOMEN'S STUDIES:  "HE did it!"

BUSINESS:     Both decide that they're spending way too much money 
together, and that it's simply cheaper to be single.

ITALIAN:      "Mama Mia!"

HISTORY:      Each party argues the breakup was caused by something the 
other party did in the past.

GEOGRAPHY:    Both people decide to simply move far away to avoid each other.

ANATOMY:      "I never liked your body anyway."

ECONOMICS:    One party demands more than the other can supply.

ENGLISH:      Each writes the other a perfect breakup letter, complete 
with introduction, thesis, body, and conclusion, that doesn't really say 
anything substantively intelligible.

EDUCATION:    Both concede that the relationship was a learning experience.

COMPUTING:    "Man, this bytes -- we just couldn't interface"  and/or 
"His hard drive was more like a floppy."

E. ENGINEER.: "It's just so shocking... I'm sure there are positives and 
negatives, but..." [okay, yes, I know you're groaning ;-)]

ARCHITECTURE: "There just wasn't much to build on anyway..."

JEWISH STUDIES: "OY!  You should feel so guilty!"

PHILOSOPHY:   If 2 people break up in a dorm and there's no one to 
witness the breakup, are they really single?

ZOOLOGY:      They were able to mate like banshees, but lacked 
sophisticated communication skills.

PHYS. ED.:    They punch each other out in frustration.

CHEMISTRY:    They turn to hard drugs to relieve the pain.

COUNSELING:   Each urges the other to "get help!"

MUSIC:        Each utilizes an operatic lament (or, in some parts, a 
country song) to express his or her sorrow.

LAW:          They sue each other for breach of a pre-dating agreement.