IJMC - What Do You Eat For Christmas?

Some have lamb. Some eat turkey. Some go all out with feasts that appease 
both the eye and the palate. But here, at the International Junk Mail 
Clearinghouse, we have one thing. Ham.                              -dave








Ok, I know they're bad, but here they are, anyway.  - Jim


What do they call Santa's helpers?
Subordinate Clauses

What do you call Santa Clause after he's fallen into a fireplace?
Krisp Kringle!

Who sings "Love Me Tender," and makes Christmas toys?
Santa's little Elvis.

Which of Santa's reindeers needs to mind his manners the most?
"Rude"olph

What did the Gingerbread Man put on his bed?
A cookie sheet!

What reindeer has the cleanest antlers?
Comet

What does the cow's  holiday greeting?
Mooooory Christmas!

What does Santa likes to eat?
A jolly roll.

Where do Santa's reindeers like to stop for lunch?
Deery Queen

What does Santa say when he is sick?
OH OH NO!

If athletes get athlete's foot, what do astronauts get?
Missle toe

How does Santa Claus take pictures?
With his North Pole-aroid.