IJMC - "It's Just Them Tourists, Pa"

I am beginning to feel really sorry for my friend who's currently working 
as a Park Ranger...then I just remember what she gets to do, and I wanna go!
BTW, for all who were wondering, yes, the IJMCs were postponed for a 
while as I was outta town...I'm back now...			       -dave





[From the May 1995 issue of OUTSIDE]

"From the ranger desks at our national parks, spectacular questions posed
by a curious citizenry."


GRAND CANYON NATIONAL PARK

1.) Was this man-made?
2.) Do you light it up at night?
3.) I bought tickets for the elevator to the bottom- where is it?
4.) Is the mule train air-conditioned?
5.) So where are the faces of the presidents?


EVERGLADES NATIONAL PARK

1.) Are the alligators real?
2.) Are the baby alligators for sale?
3.) Where are all the rides?
4.) What time does the two o'clock bus leave?


DENALI NATIONAL PARK

1.) What time do you feed the bears?
2.) What's so wonderful about Wonder Lake?
3.) Can you show me where Yeti lives?
4.) How much does Mount McKinley weigh?
5.) How often do you mow the tundra?


CARLSBAD CAVERNS NATIONAL PARK

1.) How much of the cave is underground?
2.) So what's in the unexplored part of the cave?
3.) Does it ever rain in here?
4.) How many Ping-Pong balls would it take to fill this up?
5.) So what is this- just a hole in the ground?


MESA VERDE NATIONAL PARK

1.) Did people build this, or did Indians?
2.) Why did they build the ruins so close to the road?
3.) Do you know of any undiscovered ruins?
4.) What did they worship in the kivas- their own made-up religion?
5.) Why did the Indians decide to live in Colorado?


YOSEMITE NATIONAL PARK

1.) Where are the cages for the animals?
2.) What time of year do you turn on Yosemite Falls?
3.) What happened to the other half of Half Dome?
4.) Can I get my picture taken with the carving of President Clinton?


YELLOWSTONE NATIONAL PARK

1.) Does Old Faithful erupt at night?
2.) How do you turn it on?
3.) When does the guy who turned it on get to sleep?
4.) We had no trouble finding the park entrances, but where are the exits?