IJMC - How to Shower Like a Man

Ok, so this one took much less research. And before you get any such
thoughts, I simply observed myself...again, and again, and again, and
again. Nice to have some rituals you do every day. Like drinking a bottle
of tequila, but then I only hear that some people do that every
day. Really, I would not know about drinking a bottle of tequila a day
from personal experience. Hey, stop looking at me like that!        -dave





How to shower like a man...

 =A0 1. Take off clothes while sitting on the edge of the bed and leave the=
m in a pile.
=A0  2. Walk naked to the bathroom.If you see your wife along the way, shak=
e wiener at her making the "woo-woo" sound.
 =A0 3. Look at your manly physique in the mirror and suck in your gut to s=
ee if you have pecs (not). Admire the size of your wiener in the mirror and=
 scratch your ass.
 =A0 4. Get in the shower.
 =A0 5. Don't bother to look for a washcloth (you don't use one).
 =A0 6. Wash your face.
 =A0 7. Wash your armpits.
 =A0 8. Blow your nose in your hands, then let the water just rinse it
 =A0 9. Crack up at how loud your fart sounds in the shower.
=A0 10. Majority of time is spent washing your privates and surrounding are=
a.
=A0 11. Wash your butt, leaving those coarse butt hairs on the soap bar.
=A0 12. Shampoo your hair (do not use conditioner).
=A0 13. Make a shampooMohawk.
=A0 14. Peek out of shower curtain to look at yourself in the mirror again.
=A0 15. Pee (in the shower).
=A0 16. Rinse off and get out of the shower.Fail to notice water on the flo=
or because you left the curtain hanging out of the tub the whole time.
=A0 17. Partially dry off.
=A0 18. Look at yourself in the mirror, flex muscles, admire wiener size ag=
ain.
=A0 19. Leave shower curtain open and wet bath mat on the floor.
=A0 20. Leave bathroom fan and light on.
=A0=A021. Return to the bedroom with towel around your waist. If you pass y=
our wife, pull off the towel, shake wiener at her, and make the"woo-woo" so=
und again.
=A0 22. Throw wet towel on the bed. Take 2 minutes to get dressed