IJMC - Attorney Season

Duck Season. Rabbit Season. Duck Season. Wabbit Season. Attorney Season! 
I heard a good line in a movie today..."If it wasn't for laywers we 
wouldn't need lawyers." I still like the idea that we all agree on one 
day, sometime around the year 2004, we hunt down and kill all the lawyers 
at once. Kinda like what the world did for smallpox, only better.   -dave

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Hunting Regulations
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Bill to Regulate the Hunting and Harvesting of Attorneys PC 370.00 

370.01 Any person with a valid in-state rodent or snake hunting
license may also hunt and harvest attorneys for recreational and
sport (non-commercial) purposes. 

370.02 Taking of attorneys with traps or deadfalls is permitted. The
use of United States currency as bait, however, is prohibited. 

370.03 The willful killing of attorneys with a motor vehicle is
prohibited, unless such vehicle is an ambulance being driven in
reverse. If an attorney is accidentally struck by a motor vehicle,
the dead attorney should be removed to the roadside, and the vehicle
should proceed immediately to the nearest car wash. 

370.04 It is unlawful to chase, herd or harvest attorneys from a
power boat, helicopter or aircraft. 

370.05 It is unlawful to shout, "WHIPLASH", "AMBULANCE", or "FREE
SCOTCH" for the purposes of trapping attorneys. 

370.06 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys within 100 yards of BMW,
Mercedes or Porsche dealerships, except on Wednesday afternoon. 

370.07 It is unlawful to hunt attorneys within 200 yards of
courtrooms, law libraries, health clubs, country clubs, hospitals or
brothels. 

370.08 If an attorney gains elective office, it is not necessary to
have a license to hunt, trap or possess the same.

370.09 It is unlawful for a hunter to wear a disguise as a reporter,
accident victim, physician, chiropractor or tax accountant for the
purpose of hunting attorneys. 

370.10  Bag and Possession Limits per day: Yellow-bellied
sidewinders, 2; Two-faced tortfeasors, 1; Back-stabbing divorce
litigators, 3; Horn-rimmed cut-throats, 2; Minutiae-advocating
dirtbags, 4. Honest attorneys protected (Endangered Species Act).

ARS 8007.21 It is illegal to take attorneys with a moving vehicle
unless there are no measurable skid marks at the kill site.