IJMC Newsroom Haiku

                        IJMC - Newsroom Haiku
  
Tonight, I'm just really tired. It's been a long but mostly good day; my 
car is running better, my father had a good birthday, and life continues 
to see another sunrise. So, I send out this little bit from a friend of a 
friend from a not too distant ABC affiliate...and then I go to bed. -dave







Camera One is down.
No prompter installed on Two.
Anchors eyes must shift.

Ads have gone amok.
This segment is sponsored by
Satanic Motors.

Anchors get big bucks,
hair, make-up, and clothes contracts
Watch reporters starve.

Need you to swing by
Apartment complex on fire!
Oops.  Just food on stove.

Can't make me wrap up.
I'm on live TV. I've got
your time cue right here.

Your series piece needs
promotions with explosions.
Story does not matter.

Comet destroys earth.
And water-skiing squirrels.
Join us live at 10.

No one makes beat calls.
News releases fill our day.
Turns our brains to mush.

Meeting at seven.
Game at seven.  Can you be
two places at once?

My camera is gone.
My buns are both in a sling.
Can the cops find it?

Lead just bit the dust.
Tinky-Winky gets support.
Hey.  Cool!  Our new lead!

Y2K is here.
Big problem.  With no power
Who will watch TV?

Live truck stuck in mud.
Story changed.  New promo reads:
MUD! Tonight at 10!

Five beats in line one.
Seven in line two.
Since when do TV people follow format?


by Ike Pigott
ABC 33/40.



IJMC February 1999 Archives