IJMC - The End of the Oscars?
Well, maybe not, but perhaps the last joke about these previous oscars at
least. Anyway, the connection is slipping so I'm cutting this short...but
I'll have an announcement pretty soon...tomorrow hopefully. Pray for good
internet weather, will ya? -dave
The Top 16 Little-Known Oscar Nominations
16. Best Imitation of Acting by a Bad Martial Artist -- Steven Seagal
15. Best Grip -- Monica Lewinsky
14. Breast Supporting Actress -- Demi Moore
13. Actor Slammed Most Often in a Top 5 List -- Pauly Shore
12. Largest Ego Squeezed Onto a Movie Set -- Val Kilmer
11. Best Animated Film With No Plans for a Subsequent National
Tour With "On Ice" After Its Name -- no nominations this year
10. Best Use of Erect Nipples in a Feature Length Film to Draw
Attention from Face -- Helen Hunt, "As Good As It Gets"
9. Best Performance by a Baldwin or Wayans -- Alec (again)
8. Best Performance in a Romance -- Pamela Anderson Lee;
Best Animated Long Feature -- Tommy Lee
7. Best Performance by a Frosty Bobbing Cadaver
-- Colin Winthorpe, "Titanic"
6. Best Occupation for Your Character When Playing Opposite a
Babe -- Leonardo DiCaprio's nude sketch artist, "Titanic"
5. Fastest to be Dumped When Boyfriend Reached Stardom
-- Minnie Driver, by Matt Damon
4. Most Thorough Research by an Actor Who May Someday Play
a Cowering Pretty-Boy Cellmate -- Robert Downey, Jr.
3. Special "American Gigolo" Award -- James Brolin
2. Vocal Performance from a Movie Soundtrack That Most Makes
One Envious of Those Who Drowned in the Film Because They
Never Had to Hear This Overdramatic Crap Over and Over
-- Celine Dion, "Titanic"
and the Number 1 Little-Known Oscar Nomination...
1. Fullest Monty -- Dirk Diggler, "Boogie Nights"
| Glen Gordon 770-667-5509 ext. 3456 |
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