IJMC - Vacation Time!

Ok, so I wish it was. That's what I'd love right now, a good two month 
hike up Mount Everest. Grueling climbs and sub-zero temperatures at 
night. Scary thing is, it actually sounds fun.                   -dave





  The Top 15 Signs You've Chosen the Wrong Mount Everest Guide  

15> The last three days, all you've had to eat is s'mores.  

14> Every morning greets the group with, "Wonder who'll die today?"  

13> Doesn't worry about provisions, as there's bound to be a  
    Starbucks or McDonald's every half mile or so.  

12> Gets lost in the "Sherpa Shack" gift shop.  

11> Makes everyone do upside down shots off the St. Bernard's  
    collar.  

10> First day's preparation devoted entirely to making snow angels.  

 9> Every 10 minutes, stops and yells, "RICOLA."  

 8> Throws a fit when her stiletto heel gets stuck in the ice.  

 7> Has everyone stick their tongues to a cherry popsicle "for  
    practice."  

 6> Keeps repeating, "Is it me, or is it cold up here?"  

 5> "Map, schmap -- you see the top from here!!"  

 4> Forgets to wear socks with his sandals.  

 3> Keeps using the oxygen tanks to make balloon animals.  

 2> Every so often, turns and screams, "Stop following me!"  

and the Number 1 Sign You've Chosen the Wrong Mount Everest Guide...

 1> Squeezes your ass then yells, "Hey, if we get stranded we can  
    live off Tubby here for a week!"