IJMC - No More Mir (Yet)

Ok, so maybe I won't send out another Mir joke tonight. I can't find the 
dang thing...                                                      -dave








A few months ago, Howard Stern hosted Julie Cailini ('96 Playmate
of the Year) and Stacey Sanchez ('97 Playmate of the Year) for a
morning of sordid joviality. The ladies, who were promoting their
latest calendars, answered ten questions from Howard, ostensibly to
demonstrate how important it is for them *AS ROLE MODELS* for young
women to stay up on current affairs.  The ladies' answers were
amusing (and a bit sad), but the bit did prove that you don't have
to be a neurosurgeon to earn a pile of cash!  Love him or hate him,
you have to appreciate Howard's sense of the absurd.

Q: Who is the President of Russia?
Julie: "Gorbachev"
Stacey: "Gretzky"
(correct answer: Boris Yeltsin)

Q: Define the meaning of NAACP.
Julie: "Something, something, for Certified Pianists"
Stacey: "It's some kind of police organization."
(correct answer: National Association for the Advancement of
Colored People)

Q: Who was the inventor of the lightbulb?
Julie: "I know Edison invented the telephone, but I can't remember the
        lightbulb guy."
Stacey: "I don't know."
(correct answer: Thomas A. Edison. Alexander Graham Bell
 was the phone guy!)

Q: Who is the Speaker of the House?
Julie: "Gore something-or-other."
Stacey: "Bill Clinton."
(correct answer: Newt Gingrich.  For the benefit of
international members of  the market-l, Al "Gore" is the U.S.
Vice President, "Bill Clinton" is our president. )

Q: Define the meaning of the letters CIA.
Julie: "I don't know."
Stacey: "Certified Investigation Association."
(correct answer: Central Intelligence Agency)

Q: What is the center of our solar system?
Julie: "The Equator"
Stacey: "The Moon"
(correct answer: The Sun)

Changing his tack to create better odds for the girls, Howard
switched to what he termed "industry related" questions:

Q: What do the initials "DK" stand for?
A: both knew it was fashion designer "Donna Karan."

Q: What is "Cristal?"
A: both knew it was an elite champagne

Q: What car company has a model known as a "911?"
A: both knew it was Porsche

Q: Who's face is on the (U.S.) $100 bill?
A: both knew it was Ben Franklin