IJMC Day One, Take Two

                        IJMC - Day One, Take Two

Well, Netcom's actually being nice enough to let me send out two posts 
tonight, I guess to make up for not letting me last night. Although, I 
must admit my attention is rather elsewhere as I now have this thing 
running around on my desktop. It's a cross between a llama and the anime 
character Shampoo...and it's silly. I wonder how long it will last since 
I really enjoyed when it screamed across my desktop in flames.     -dave

AMNESIA: Condition that enables a woman who has gone through labor to
         have sex again.

DUMBWAITER: One who asks if the kids would care to order dessert.

FAMILY PLANNING: The art of spacing your children the proper distance
                 apart to keep you on the edge of financial disaster.

FULL NAME: What you call your child when you're mad at him.

GRANDPARENTS: The people who think your children are wonderful even
              though they're sure you're not raising them right.

IMPREGNABLE: A woman whose memory of labor is still vivid.

INDEPENDENT: How we want our children to be as long as they do
             everything we say.

OW: The first word spoken by children with older siblings.

PRENATAL: When your life was still somewhat your own.

PUDDLE: A small body of water that draws other small bodies wearing dry
        shoes into it.

SHOW OFF: A child who is more talented than yours.

STERILIZE: What you do to your first baby's pacifier by boiling it and
           to your last baby's pacifier by blowing on it.

TOP BUNK: Where you should never put a child wearing Superman jammies.

TWO-MINUTE WARNING: When the baby's face turns red and it begins to
	            make those familiar grunting noises;(or is it TWO

IJMC May 1997 Archives