IJMC - Drunk Tales

Here's a story of a drunk who went one too far with a good excuse. Short, 
sweet, and simple...                                                -dave






A man with a terribly over-bearing wife is allowed to go out with the boys only
once a year, but cannot come home roaring drunk.

But as it happens, he got so drunk he retched all over his shirt.

"My wif's gonna murder me for tthhhhisssss," he told a drinking buddy.

"Not to worry," he buddy said, sticking a $20 dollar bill in his shirt pocket.
"Just tell her that a buddy of yours got sick on you and gave you $20 to take
care of the dry cleaning."

Arriving home he found his other half wait, arms crossed, toe tapping, scowling.

"I know wha your thinking, swee-hart. Buh is not my fall. Buddy 'o mine did it,
buh gafe me twenny dollerz for dry cleaning.

"Well, let me see," she responds, reaching into his shirt pocket. But instead of
one, she found two $20 bills. "I thought you told me he gave you $20 to dry
clean your shirt..."

"Tha's right, he did. Buh the sonovbish shit in my pants too!"