IJMC - Answer & Question

Ok, some, well, ok, many of these are on about a third grader's level. 
But other's can keep ya going for a little bit. Expect too much and be 
dissapointed; expect too little and just give up now.            -dave






 ANSWER: Gatorade.
 QUESTION: What does an alligator get on welfare?
 
 A: Bible belt.
 Q: What holds up Oral Roberts' pants?
 
 A: Milk and honey.
 Q: What do you get from a bee that has an udder?
 
 A: Clean air, a virgin and a gas station open on Sunday.
 Q: Name three things you won't find in Los Angeles.
 
 A: Black and white and twenty feet tall.
 Q: Describe Sister Mary Kong.
 
 A: Ben Gay.
 Q: Why didn't Mrs. Franklin have any kids?
 
 A: An unmarried woman.
 Q: What was Elizabeth Taylor between 3 and 5 pm on June 1, 1952?
 
 A: Disjoint.
 Q: What was dat hippie smoking?
 
 A: The Laughing Policeman.
 Q: What do you call a cop who frisks himself?
 
 A: Dustin Hoffman.
 Q: Describe someone cleaning his Hoffman.
 
 A: Until he gets caught.
 Q: How long does a United States Congressman serve?
 
 A: Old wives tale.
 Q: What do cannibals find hard to digest?
 
 A: Rub-a-dub-dub.
 Q: What does a masseuse do to your dub-dub?
 
 A: Shareholder.
 Q: What did Sonny Bono used to be?
 
 A: Skalliwags.
 Q: What does your skalli do when it's happy?
 
 A: David Frost.
 Q: On a cold morning what forms on your david?
 
 A: Head and shoulders.
 Q: What do you see if you open the trunk of the Godfather's car?
 
 A: Hickory Dickory Dock.
 Q: Who do you go to when you have a pain in your hickory dickory?
 
 A: "Rose Bowl."
 Q: What do you say when it's Rose's turn at the bowling alley?
 
 A: That darn cat.
 Q: Who ruined that darn rug?
 
 A: High rollers.
 Q: Describe a stoned bowling team.
 
 A: Gunga din.
 Q: What do you hear when you put an amplifier in your gunga?
 
 A: "Follow the yellow brick road."
 Q: What are good directions to a urologist's office?
 
 A: At both ends.
 Q: Where do New Yorkers put their dogs muzzles?
 
 A: Igloo.
 Q: What do you use to keep your ig from falling off?
 
 A: R-O-L-A-I-D-S.
 Q: How does a stupid person spell "backgammon"?
 
 A: Grape Nuts.
 Q: What are Ernest and Julio Gallo?
 
 A: Supervisor.
 Q: What does Clark Kent wear to keep the sun out of his eyes?
 
 A: Crabgrass.
 Q: What do crabs get high on?
 
 A: Shake-N-Bake.
 Q: Describe a double feature with Earthquake and The Towering Inferno.
 
 A: Blazing Saddles.
 Q: What do they put on horses at the Preparation H Ranch?
 
 A: Flypaper.
 Q: What do you use to gift wrap a zipper?
 
 A: Deep freeze.
 Q: Name an Eskimo porno film.
 
 A: Bedbug.
 Q: What would Republicans use to eavesdrop on a hooker?