IJMC - Green Eggs and Hamlet

I can no longer see straight. I need sleep. I will hurt Mike. Enjoy this 
little spoof of Shakespeare and Dr. Seuss.                         -dave





GREEN EGGS & HAMLET

 I ask to be, or not to be.
 That is the question, I ask of me.
 This sullied life, it makes me shudder.
 My uncle's boffing dear, sweet mother.
 Would I, could I take my life?
 Could I, should I, end this strife?
 Should I jump out of a plane?
 Or throw myself before a train?
 Should I from a cliff just leap?
 Could I put myself to sleep?
 Shoot myself, or take some poison?
 Maybe try self immoloition?
 To shudder off this mortal coil,
 I could stab myself with a fencing foil.
 Slash my wrists while in the bath?
 Would it end my angst and wrath?
 To sleep, to dream, now there's the rub.
 I could drop a toaster in my tub.
 Would all be glad, if I were dead?
 Could I perhaps kill them instead?
 This line of thought takes consideration -
 For I'm the king of procrastination.

				Submitted by: Steven Anderson @ emory.edu