IJMC Microsoft vs. Detroit

                    IJMC - Microsoft vs. Detroit

Nope, Apple hasn't yet picked up Microsoft's theme for code names, this 
one is a bit more frightening. I'm just a tad scared of the idea of seeing a 
car with moving clouds on all of the windows as an "Interior Saver".
(just remember, AfterDark looks better but mysteriously affects your 
seatbelts!)                                                            -dave





Top 10 Ways Microsoft Would Change The Auto Business
----------------------------------------------------

 10. New seats would require everyone to have the same butt size.

 9.  We would all have to switch to Microsoft Gas.

 8.  The U.S. government would be forced to rebuild all of the roads for
     Microsoft cars; they will drive on the old roads, but they run very
     slowly.

 7.  The oil, alternator, gas and engine warning lights would be replaced
     by a single 'General Car Fault' warning light.

 6.  Sun MotorSystems would make a car that was solar-powered, twice as
     reliable and five times as fast, but would run on only 5% of the
     roads.                    [IJMC - and cost three times as much...]

 5.  You would be constantly pressured to upgrade your car.

 4.  You could have only one person in the car at a time, unless you
     bought a Car95 or CarNT -- but then you would have to buy ten more
     seats and a new engine.

 3.  Occasionally, your car would die for NO apparent reason and you
     would have to restart it.  Strangely, you would just accept this as
     normal.

 2.  Every time the lines of the road were repainted, you would have to
     buy a new car.

 1.  People would get excited about the new features of the latest
     Microsoft cars, forgetting that these same features had been
     available from other car makers for years!


IJMC July 1996 Archives