IJMC Undocumented Error Codes

                     IJMC - Undocumented Error Codes

How timely. Just as the world discovers the newest Microsoft Macro virus 
this reaches the end of the queue, ready to burst forth into the world, 
reminding everyone why they wanted a Mac instead. And if you haven't 
heard about the new Microsoft Macro virus, let me fill you in. If you're 
using Microsoft Internet Explorer 3.0 (the new one) you are susceptible to a 
new macro virus (kinda like _Microsoft_ Word and _Microsoft_ Excel, not 
Lotus products...) which allows a web page to access DOS commands. Like 
"format c: /y" or "del *.*". Ok, now there is a patch for it already, but 
I think the better idea is just to go out, get Netscape Navigator, and be 
very happy. Especially since the first looks at Microsoft Internet 
Explorer are hinting at Java security problems that Netscape doesn't have 
(and Microsoft claims their Java is more compatible than the Java browser 
built by the people who wrote Java...hmmm?). Ok, rant off. Just get 
Netscape Navigator after you read this. :)                          -dave







The following is a list of undocumented Windows 95 error codes which
somehow got overlooked when printing the documentation.

     WinErr 001: Windows loaded - System in danger
     WinErr 002: No Error - Yet
     WinErr 003: Dynamic linking error - Your mistake is now in every file
     WinErr 004: Erroneous error - Nothing is wrong
     WinErr 005: Multitasking attempted - System confused
     WinErr 006: Malicious error - Desqview found on drive
     WinErr 007: System price error - Inadequate money spent on hardware
     WinErr 008: Broken window - Watch out for glass fragments
     WinErr 009: Horrible bug encountered - God knows what has happened
     WinErr 00A: Promotional literature overflow - Mailbox full
     WinErr 00B: Inadequate disk space - Free at least 50MB
     WinErr 00C: Memory hog error - More Ram needed. More! More! More!
     WinErr 00D: Window closed - Do not look outside
     WinErr 00E: Window open - Do not look inside
     WinErr 00F: Unexplained error - Please tell us how this happened
     WinErr 010: Reserved for future mistakes by our developers
     WinErr 011: Window open - Do not look outside
     WinErr 012: Window closed - Do not look inside
     WinErr 013: Unexpected error - Huh ?
     WinErr 014: Keyboard locked - Try anything you can think of.
     WinErr 018: Unrecoverable error - System has been destroyed. Buy a
                 new one. Old Windows licence is not valid anymore.
     WinErr 019: User error - Not our fault. Is Not! Is Not!
     WinErr 01A: Operating system overwritten - Please reinstall all your
                 software. We are terribly sorry.
     WinErr 01B: Illegal error - You are not allowed to get this error.
                 Next time you will get a penalty for that.
     WinErr 01C: Uncertainty error - Uncertainty may be inadequate.
     WinErr 01D: System crash - We are unable to figure out our own code.
     WinErr 01E: Timing error - Please wait. And wait. And wait. And wait.
     WinErr 01F: Reserved for future mistakes of our developers.
     WinErr 020: Error recording error codes - Additional errors will be 
                 lost.
     WinErr 042: Virus error - A virus has been activated in a dos-box.
                 The virus, however, requires Windows. All tasks will 
                 automatically be closed and the virus will be re-activated 
     WinErr 079: Mouse not found - A mouse driver has not been installed.
                 Please click the left mouse button to continue.
     WinErr 103: Error buffer overflow - Too many errors encountered.
                 Additional errors may not be displayed or recorded.
     WinErr 666: Error of the Beast.
     WinErr 678: This will end your Windows session. Do you want to play
                 another game?
     WinErr 683: Time out error - Operator fell asleep while waiting for the
                 system to complete boot procedure.
     WinErr 815: Insufficient Memory - Only 50,312,583 Bytes available


IJMC August 1996 Archives