IJMC - How Cold Is It?

Don't forget, a good "slam" will lower any temperature by an additional 
5 degrees. Also, for our foreign readers (who can probably figure this 
out on their own...) this scale is definately not in Celsius. I've 
personally survived no lower than -26, and yes, jumper cables were 
quite required.                                                   -dave



HOW COLD IS IT?

 An annotated thermometer

  60    - Californians put on sweaters
          (if they can find one in their wardrobe)

  50    - Miami residents turn on the heat

  40    - You can see your breath
          Californians shiver uncontrollably
          Minnesotans go swimming

  35    - Italian cars don't start

  32    - Water freezes

  30    - You plan your vacation to Australia
          Minnesotans put on T-shirts
          Politicians begin to worry about the homeless
          British cars don't start
          Your boogers freeze

  25    - Boston water freezes
          Californians weep pitiably
          Minnesotans eat ice cream
          Canadians go swimming

  20    - You can hear your breath
          Politicians begin to talk about the homeless
          New York City water freezes
          Miami residents plan vacation further South

  15    - French cars don't start
          You plan a vacation in Mexico
          Cat insists on sleeping in your bed with you

  10    - Too cold to ski
          You need jumper cables to get the car going

   5    - You plan your vacation in Houston
          American cars don't start

   0    - Alaskans put on T-shirts
          Too cold to skate

  -10   - German cars don't start
          Eyes freeze shut when you blink

  -15   - You can cut your breath and use it to build an igloo
          Arkansans stick tongue on metal objects
          Miami residents cease to exist

  -20   - Cat insists on sleeping in your pajamas with you
          Politicians actually do something about the homeless
          Minnesotans shovel snow off roof
          Japanese cars don't start

  -25   - Too cold to think
          You need jumper cables to get the driver going

  -30   - You plan a two week hot bath
          The Mighty Monongahela freezes
          Swedish cars don't start

  -40   - Californians disappear
          Minnesotans button top button
          Canadians put on sweaters
          Your car helps you plan your trip South

  -50   - Congressional hot air freeze
          Alaskans close the bathroom window

  -80   - Hell freezes over
          Polar bears move south