IJMC - The Declaration of Independance

You know, I just found out I misspelled "espresso" on my container of 
espresso coffee (I added an x, so sue me). But that isn't have the 
trouble this poor chap Jefferson recieved when he wrote a little critical 
essay...							    -dave




The Court of King George III
London, England

July 10, 1776

Mr. Thomas Jefferson
c/o The Continental Congress Philadelphia,
Pennsylvania


Dear Mr. Jefferson:

We have read your "Declaration of Independence" with great
interest. Certainly, it represents a considerable undertaking,
and many of your statements do merit serious consideration.
Unfortunately, the Declaration as a whole fails to meet recently
adopted specifications for proposals to the Crown, so we must
return the document to you for further refinement. The questions
which follow might assist you in your process of revision:

1. In your opening paragraph you use the phrase "the Laws of
   Nature and Nature's God."  What are these laws?  In what way are
   they the criteria on which you base your central arguments?
   Please document with citations from the recent literature.

2. In the same paragraph you refer to the "opinions of
   mankind."  Whose polling data are you using?  Without specific
   evidence, it seems to us the "opinions of mankind" are a matter
   of opinion.

3. You hold certain truths to be "self-evident."  Could you
   please elaborate.  If they are as evident as you claim then it
   should not be difficult for you to locate the appropriate
   supporting statistics.

4. "Life, Liberty, and the pursuit of happiness" seem to be the
   goals of your proposal.  These are not measurable goals.  If you
   were to say that "among these is the ability to sustain an
   average life expectancy in six of the 13 colonies of at least 55
   years, and to enable newspapers in the colonies to print news
   without outside interference, and to raise the average income of
   the colonists by 10 percent in the next 10 years," these could be
   measurable goals.  Please clarify.

5. You state that "Whenever any Form of Government becomes
   destructive of these ends, it is the Right of the People to alter
   or to abolish it, and to institute a new Government...."  Have
   you weighed this assertion against all the alternatives?  What
   are the trade-off considerations?

6. Your description of the existing situation is quite
   extensive.  Such a long list of grievances should precede the
   statement of goals, not follow it.  Your problem statement needs
   improvement.

7. Your strategy for achieving your goal is not developed at
   all.  You state that the colonies "ought to be Free and
   Independent States," and that they are "Absolved from All
   Allegiance to the British Crown."  Who or what must change to
   achieve this objective?  In what way must they change?  What
   specific steps will you take to overcome the resistance? How long
   will it take?  We have found that a little foresight in these
   areas helps to prevent careless errors later on.  How
   cost-effective are your strategies?

8. Who among the list of signatories will be responsible for
   implementing your strategy?  Who conceived it?  Who provided the
   theoretical research? Who will constitute the advisory committee?
   Please submit an organization chart and vitas of the principal
   investigators.

9. You must include an evaluation design.  We have been
   requiring this since Queen Anne's War.

10.What impact will your problem have?  Your failure to include
   any assessment of this inspires little confidence in the
   long-range prospects of your undertaking.

11.Please submit a PERT diagram, an activity chart, itemized
   budget, and manpower utilization matrix.


     We hope that these comments prove useful in revising your
"Declaration of Independence."  We welcome the submission of your
revised proposal.  Our due date for unsolicited proposals is July
31, 1776.  Ten copies with original signatures will be required.

Sincerely,

Management Analyst to the British Crown