IJMC - A Day At The Races!
If you are offended by sexual connotations...skip this one. Otherwise, 
enjoy. I wish I knew who wrote it, I'd like to shake their hand. -dave
                              DETROIT RACEWAY
                          Time:       Midnight
                          Distance:   All the way
                          Purse:      $200.00
                          Weather:    Very Drunk
                          Track:      Drippy
         Name            Odds               Name            Odds
         ----            ----               ----            ----
      Bare Belly          2-1            Silk Panties        2-1
      Passionate Lady     5-1            Clean Sheets      100-1
      Conscience        100-1            Big Dick            3-1
      Heavy Bosom         6-1            Thighs              5-1
      Cherry              3-1            Jockey Shorts       5-1
                                Favorites
                                ---------
                             Douche Bag 1-1
        THEY'RE OFF
    Conscience is left at the post.  Silk Panties and Jockey Shorts are
    off with a rush.  Bare Belly is beginning to show.  Heavy Bosom
    with Clean Sheets at the back.  Douche Bag is completely lost.
        AT THE RAIL
    It's Bare Belly on top.  Thighs open up a hole and Big Dick is
    going in.  Heavy Bosom is hard pressed.  Passionate Lady is coming
    strong and Conscience is completely lost.
        AT THE TURN
    It's Cherry between Big Dick and Passionate Lady.  Thighs working
    hard and Bare Belly is under terrific pressure.
        AT THE STRETCH
    Cherry cracks under the strain as Big Dick goes in for the kill.
    Passionate Lady is doing her best and Bare Belly is close up.  Big
    Dick passed Thighs by a full length and Passionate Lady is almost
    overcome.
        AT THE FINISH
    Big Dick rushes in, but Passionate Lady takes all he has and it's a
    dead heat. Heavy Bosom folds, Bare Belly is all lathered up at the
    finish. Thighs pull up and Clean Sheets never had a chance while
    Conscience wasn't even tn the race from the start.  Big Dick
    unexpectedly gives a quick spurt and Passionate Lady kept coming.
    Douche Bag came in last to clean up the track.
Yet Another E-Mail Sent By The International Junk Mail Clearinghouse (IJMC).
Unless otherwise specified, distribute freely. All questions, comments,
submissions, and requests should be directed to Dave at eatheror@netcom.com
       IJMC WebPage - http://gsusgi2.gsu.edu/~stdmdix/ijmc/ijmc.html
This is Mac.                                            \\\\|////
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